smaller synchronicity

Friend shared his experience: Suddenly I got a thought to wish you during Diwali and I thought to myself I'll wish you if you are online in a minute or so else not. And Lo within a minute you did come online. And so I did wish you for Diwali.

Coincidence? 

Also seeing numbers 11:11, 555, 7773 and 666 something.

Coming back to my update : 

Did Shiv Pooja and watching his serial. It's still unclear whether i should go to Tiruvannamalai or not 

Vanaprastha decision

29 Oct - saw 9514 and it's variations (5914 etc) many times. I'm focusing on following Vanaprastha/Sanyas stage and avoiding everything else. Snake skin. 

Also seeing 555. White butterfly 

30 oct : yellow butterfly and serpent in lake.

to Verify Signs from Cosmos?

Friends prayer on 27 Oct around 1:40 pm Sunday 

All signs indicating harmonious reunion except the actual 3D with - and karmic. If this is true let my eye vibrate and after few seconds my right eye twitches and vibrates. Logging it here to test and verify if this is true. Prayer was to allow the reunion happen in Oct or Nov. 

28-10 - 3D is showing opposite signs. This indicates all my illusions were just that only illusions. Why this triggered me - because I know for sure I am still having an expectation of reunion, the expectation is being created by knowledge of - concepts. 

I am so done with this concept because it's just misleading me - what's the point getting such messages from Supreme

Evening also 9514 cab i saw while returning home after seeing 4444 and having soup.

Everyday I see everyone happy other than me I feel. I want to quit 

Illusion of free will

Free will is an illusion. This first occurred to me when i saw Shiva cursing Kamdev because Kamdev was trying to disturb his meditation. Upon further root causing Kamdev had a curse from Brahma that he will get this curse from Shiva or so when he was not paying attention to whatever he was teaching him.

Kamdev did not have a choice to not provoke shiva either when all the Gods asked him to.

https://youtu.be/pCofmZlC72g?si=09jvUbRgI8b_svtO

The above video is a deep dive from Sam Harris on the illusion of free will. If we have no control on what we think next, how can we say we have free will. Even the experience of the present moment is a memory created by the brain. And we experience that memory. If we have control over our thoughts then we should be able to think about what we are going to think. But we dont.

Everything a lover or a wife does is try to control the other. If unable to control she leaves. But if they themselves dont have free will are they really controlling you ? Who is orchestrating all this then ?

I had no control over the desire to crave for Dr role in DCAR, I got the desire that also I didnt have control, I acted on the desire that also i did not have control, I did not get the role, that also I didnt have control, I was disappointed and left to AMZ that also I didnt have control, I was over working at AMZ due to the team where i was put in - that also i did not have control, and wanted to get into a better WLB that also i didnt have control, the offer i received from GEHC at that exact time that i also i didnt have control. Coming back to a team where i had some members I had no control. Meeting people who i felt like i had a connection I had no control, desires I had no control. Loss of connection I had no control. 

Where was I ever in control?

Btw went to Nandi hills and saw couple of Butterflies mting and Nandi and Shiv temple. I whispered in Nandis ears to help me be like Him in cmplete surrender to Shiva from that moment. And to bless my friend from TF separation towards a harmonious union free from Karmics. 

Sudden Attachment

Dispute all the detachment and 1ness with Shiv and feeling devoted to Shiva and constantly keeping him in the mind. There are times when the mind suddenly goes back to Old patterns. 

Constantly be persistent on meditating on Shiva with Ajapajapa. Discard the world. Remember there is no such thing called free will. Everything is orchestrated by Shiva/Shakti - Right eye twitching when I type this 

Saw 9:11 on phone today.

DECISION NOT TO GIVE UP ON YOUR INTENTION TO BE SIVA. EITHER TOU GIVE LIFE TO "GIVING UP" OR "WILL PERSISTENCE.."

Small positive update

My Friend says :

Oct 24: Met at work. Mostly feedback and it was only around what she wants. But I could see some change, she wasn't leaving my cabin only even for lunch until I reminded, rejected twice the calls that came in, came second time to meet me and came to meet Vidya along. Post that she wanted to say something and stopped herself. 

I was in contemplation of Shiv during this entire time and away from any chasing energy or attachment.

Not going to read anything into this but just wanted it to be noted. 

Feeling super lazy to work today 

Oct 25th : I went out to have tea - got vision from Bholenath (after chanting tatpurushaya vidmahe) to go near bakery. After going there got both Parijat and Bel Patra. 

Lower energies

I should not spend too much time in 3D

Living 2/3rd within

Hey Bholenath - Please protect me from all the lower chakra beings.

Thanks Bholenath for your darshan as snake in the lake. 

Twin runner also goes through DNOTS per this : https://youtu.be/ABuWNDb_drc?si=vv3OaDDWwcK3_SZA

mom's birthday

Mom's birthday today and I don't know why, nothing much seems to be happening 

I'm missing my Shiva and didn't see snake also 

Did see pigeon and dog and that's it. The old lady at lake was happily blessing me.

By the way I drew this on my room 

Mind is too much into masculine energies not much emotions but thinking more about work. Not sure why. 

Not feeling the obsessive pull. Right eye twitching a lot. While driving I see this

Hey bholenath it's 8.06 pm And suddenly getting cravings. Why. ? Please protect me and lift me to Kailash