Step II - Lean on your spine and get centered.

You are only that "AWARENESS" which visits different areas of minds, like how a traveler travels to different cities in the world. Just ponder over the words, AWARENESS, WILLPOWER, ENERGY. And you will be centered. You are that intangible energy that powers every muscle and vein in your body. Awareness has to pass through confused states of mind in meditation where consciousness tends to indentify itself with awareness itself rather than that which is aware of and has to be eliminated through the light of understanding. By becoming consciously conscious every moment, we live in the present fully aware of whats happening around, "Am i fully aware of what im doing right now?" .... "Im all right, right now" These will be mantras going forward from this moment. And I will find my self god in the that of the that of the that, I will, I Will and I WILL.

Excerpt from Sri Sri Sivaya Subramuniya swami's "Merging with Siva"Chapter 16 "Im all right right now", my loving guru:

We have to lean on our own spine. But first we have to claim our spiritual heritage and feel "I'm all right, right now." By saying this and believing it, we pull the energies in just a little and become centered again. When we ask ourselves point blank, "Am I all right, right now?" we have to come up with a "Yes." Lean on your own spine. Feel the power in the spine. Feel the energy in the spine. The energy in the spine is not concerned with any fear or worry or doubt -- not at all. It is a pure, powerful, blissful energy. Lean on it, and you will go crashing through into inner states of meditation. Things in the world will also work out right for you. You will be in the flow of life. You will have perfect timing. Beautiful things will begin to happen to you in the exterior world. Opportunities will open up for you where there were no opportunities before. People will become nice to you who ordinarily would not. All this and more begins to happen because mentally you are leaning on yourself, and people in general like you to do this.

Realization Is the Key

What does it mean to "get centered" and to "be centered"? Actually, what it means is to feel the primal source within, to feel so centered that you are the center. And we always are something of what we feel, our hands or our legs or our bodies or our emotions or our desires. Most people on the path have the desire to get rid of their desires. It's an impossible battle. Have you ever tried to get rid of your desires? If you would stop trying to get rid of your desires, then you would be centered, because you then take the energy out of desire. You take awareness away from that world of desire, and you get right in the primal source of the energy which flows through the physical body. It flows through the emotional network, right through the intellectual mind. That primal source of energy is flowing through the spine in each and every one of us this very moment. Feel it?

The entire spiritual unfoldment process, oddly enough, is designed to throw you off center so that you have to work to pull yourself on center. First life throws you off center. You have all kinds of experiences. You make mistakes and, with your indomitable will, have to control that fluctuating awareness to get it right on center and be all right, right now. Feel that powerful energy flowing through every nerve current and be that energy rather than the fluctuating nerve current. Then, one day, when you really get good at it, you find a guru. You are firmly on center, and he tries to throw you off.

My guru, Yogaswami, would always throw his disciples off center and set them spinning. They had to work hard with themselves to get on center again. That strengthens the sinews and the muscles of man's becoming himself, becoming totally aware that he is aware and then controlling his mind by not allowing his awareness to get caught up in the vast illusion of the externalities of the mind. How's that? That's a good one -- the vast illusion of the externalities of the mind!
What is this center? Well, it's like the inside of an empty glass. You know something is there, and when you're aware of it, you know that you're aware inside that empty glass. However, when you're aware of the glass itself, that's something else. When you're aware of the outside of the glass, that's something else again. When you're aware of the table the glass is sitting on, again that's something else. Now imagine you are like the glass. Become aware of the space inside. That is the tangible intangible you have to grasp.

The best way to work this is a very simple way. Let's try it now. Just open and close your hands and feel the muscles and the bones. Now feel an intangible something, an intangible energy, which is that life force, and soon you will feel a force within that. That is your force of awareness that gives the command to the life forces, to the muscles and sinews which open and close your hand. So, be that intangible force rather than the hand. Be the commander who commands the muscles to relax and tense, to open and close. It's an intangible reality. This you realize. You don't think about it. Your intellect cannot give it to you. Your instinct and emotions cannot give it to you. It's something you have to realize. When you grasp it, you start to unfold and awaken spiritually. It comes from the deeper chakras, the higher chakras. And it's very easy. You either have grasped it or you haven't grasped it. So, work with that and grasp that. Then the unfoldment process begins. Finally you begin to see light within the head, light within the body. You begin to have beautiful, beautiful inner experiences. Everybody these days wants to have profound inner experiences without the use of drugs, or without the use of anything but their own positive willpower. That's the goal of the unfoldment of the people of all nations today, according to my own poll. And it is the right and mature goal.

Step I - Aligning myself with the divine guidelines

The below Yamas & Niyamas will be guidelines for every thought/physical action in my life from today. Im finally aligning myself with the divine laws and i proceed with complete faith and confidence that by following the below right conducts and right behaviours, Gods grace will shine on me, will work for me and eventually whatever happens will be for my spiritual evolutionary progress. Aum Gurudevaya Namah.

The Ten Yamas, Restraints for Proper Conduct from the Vedas

Ahimsa - Non-injury : Not harming others, by thought word or deed. To give up revenge

Satya - Truthfullness : Refraining from lying and betraying promises.

Asteya - Non-stealing : Neither stealing, nor coveting, nor entering into debt.

brahmacharya - Divine conduct : Controlling lust by remaining celibate when single.

kshama - Patience : Restraining intolerance and impatience in dealing with circumstances

dhriti - Steadfastedness : Overcoming nonperseverance, Indecision, Fear and changeable ness (flickering mind)

daya - Compassion : Conquering insensitive feelings towards all beings
arjava - Honesty, Straightforward : Renouncing deception & wrong doing
mitahara - Moderate eating : Neither eating in excess, nor consuming meat/eggs
shaucha - Purity : Avoiding impurity in mind, body and speech.

The Ten Niyamas, Observances for Spiritual Life from the Vedas

hri - Remorse : Being modest and showing shame for misdeeds.
santosha - Contentment : Seeking joy and serenity in life.
dana - Giving : Sacrificing and being generous without thought of expectations
astikya - Faith : Believing firmly in God, Gods, guru and path to enlightenment.
Ishvarapujana - Worship of the Almighty : The cultivation of devotion through daily worship and meditation.

siddhanta shravana - Scriptural Listening : Studying the teachings and listening to the wise of one's lineage.
mati - Cognition : Developing a spiritual will and intellect with guru's guidance.
vrata - Sacred vows : Fulfilling religious vows, rules and observances faithfully.
japa - Recitation : Chanting mantras daily.
tapas - Austerity : Performing sadhana, penance, tapas and sacrifice.

Things working fine.

After visiting Madurai Meenakshi Temple with friends, and conversing with them, i realized what trouble my friends are going through. Compared to which my problems were nothing. There are people in this world who have suffered major heart breaks, lost loved ones. Its very very painful affair when one suffers a heart break from a loved one. Its astonishing to see how the mind due to its own novelty is the root cause of all problems, yet due to our identification with it, we suffer even though we are all perfect right now. I have come to a conclusion that desire is the root cause of misery, its the desire which is repressed in the subconscious which is more difficult to eliminate that the conscious ones. The desires in the subconscious have to be understood through meditation and eliminated through understanding. This is a seemingly easy process, but its necessary to achieve concentration and quieting the mind first in order to do it successfully.

Gods are really listening to me, my prayer to Lord Ganesh, Lord Shanmug, Lord Krishna, My Sai and Goddess Madurai Meenakshi have been answered. They have all been kind to me and have made me strong on my path to perfection. They are making me realize the importance of execution, my subconscious desires and the way to conquer them. Looks like i am all set on the path now. The most important thing that i should keep in mind is to be consciously conscious. To look at my own mind, analyse when the thoughts come spontaneously. Find out whether they came from subconscious desires, understand and resolve repressions, kill the subconscious desire through the light of understanding (problem statement, root cause analysis, end result analysis, effects). Wait till i figure out how a subconscious desire in the subconscious mind resolves itself into an emotion in the lower mind (lower chakras) .... Then bounce myself back into the higher mind, to the higher chakras which is under the control of Lord Subramanya. I guess visiting a spiritual land like Madurai and such other holy places can do miracles on an individuals spiritual progress. Thanks to all the ever-loving Gods of the 2'nd world.

Essence of all Knowledge in a Nutshell

I realized today that finally the essence of all teachings drills down to 2 things

• External worship and internal speculation are 2 faces of the same coin. Request God for help in prayer and forget the problem.
• Live in the present – that’s the essence of meditation
• While living in the present, do things that are prompted by super consciousness (intuition)

My Goals

Most important message from Sai baba – These MUST be followed even if none of the others are followed

• Pray for others, Be kind and caring for parents. Don’t be money minded
• Chant gayatri, Aditya hrudayam regularly.
• Give importance to things that matter most to you, work on those goals.
• To attain Brahman, one has to do great sacrifice, control the 5 senses, the mind and the intelligence. One who isn’t willing to donate 5 Rs to the poor, how will he ever attain control over the 5 indriyas?
• Meditate on the region in between the eyes, where you will get My vision.
• Develop divine thinking and look at the world through My eyes. See Me in everyone you interact.

* Live like on the top of a tree, when the tree leans to the front – u r thinking of future, when the tree leans to your back – u r falling to the past. Always stay balancing on the top.

* Goal is to make mind 1 pointed so that we live in present

* On an avg. we get 60,000 thoughts per day, Reduce the thoughts by setting Goals.

* While living in the present, don’t let the mind carried away by distractions, Focus on the goals instead.

* Don’t worry about future, just see the goal and execute and focus fully on the present, future will b taken care of.

* Look for the source of I and find I-I that is continuous and unbroken, with a mild light and a high pitch sound, attain and maintain this state.