Havent been able to meditate for this whole month now. Was blessed with a baby boy on 11th sept. Was on board to Pune that night. The happiness was great and unimaginable. Had a few more experiences and learnings after that. I'm looking eye to eye with my son with awe and respect. Who could he be ? He could be a soul who could have been an ancestor of mine, perhaps a very dear grandmother/grandfather, a cousin/friend who passed on when young or a great rishi who has come for the upliftment of mankind, perhaps my guru himself? Who could he be? I will never know unless my observation becomes very keen.
Also observed how quickly the subconscious mind builds up in the absence of daily sadhana. Im observing that since the past few days, the past and future appearing more real to me than ever before. Mind often goes to past off late, going back to experiences which were pleasant or unpleasant. I need to engage my willpower again in controlling the built up odic forces. i pray lord ganesha again as usual, to get back on track. Aum
Friday, September 30, 2011
Monday, September 5, 2011
Observing Odic energies
Once you start looking at the world as odic energy and identify
yourself as actinic energy - many misconceptions, attachments that have
bothered the mind for many many years - begin to lose their hold on us.
Experienced this very recently when I was observing the various mandals
during Ganesha Chaturthi day in Pune.
Though the crowd was so huge with various people with different motives praying the lord, I sensed a calm within me. A calm which nothing can take away from me even amidst a noisy crowd. My energy levels that night after walking for so long was still high though I'm technically supposed to be tired.
The more you are aware of the actinic energy and odic energy, the more consciously you know how to maintain the same within yourself. Awareness is Power. Energy flows where awareness goes.
Though the crowd was so huge with various people with different motives praying the lord, I sensed a calm within me. A calm which nothing can take away from me even amidst a noisy crowd. My energy levels that night after walking for so long was still high though I'm technically supposed to be tired.
The more you are aware of the actinic energy and odic energy, the more consciously you know how to maintain the same within yourself. Awareness is Power. Energy flows where awareness goes.
Helplessness
The moment you give up that there is nothing that can be done about the way the mind moves - all you can do at the max is silently watch it - that's when you are perceiving. The mind despite any sort of spiritual training has its own instinctive desires, intellectual desire and desires of various sorts including occult powers. The mind is a lie and a lie cannot give you truth - my gurudeva said soon after he realized the self.
One of the other gurus sri amma bhagavan says - only when the mind/ego completely gives up in surrender - that there is nothing you can do about it - that's when grace starts flowing - that's the moment it happens. Stillness itself is knowledge and bliss. As i type this i realize how the mind keeps taking us in circles on and on leading us nowhere. Regulation of breath and a keen observation (mindfulness) can only give you glimpses of the volatility pf the mind.
One of the other gurus sri amma bhagavan says - only when the mind/ego completely gives up in surrender - that there is nothing you can do about it - that's when grace starts flowing - that's the moment it happens. Stillness itself is knowledge and bliss. As i type this i realize how the mind keeps taking us in circles on and on leading us nowhere. Regulation of breath and a keen observation (mindfulness) can only give you glimpses of the volatility pf the mind.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
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