Scared of Life ?

Hindu Gods are simply great intelligent beings. Through their form and dressing they convey something to human beings. All ancient temples had this beauty and one thing common amongst them -- Linking the external world to the internal. In any Siva temple, the Nandi (which represents the ego) is the biggest when it is far outside the temple and away from the God, its size reduces when we find another Nandi closer to the God inside the temple, and it size is the smallest when in front of God. This actually is symbolic of how the ego naturally reduces as an individual approaches God internal to him in his own life as he evolves towards Self realization.

I have seen many of my friends, relatives, even parents mostly spend time in the fears of future, avoiding certain people, favoring certain experiences to another, worried about their seemingly not-so-perfect past. They believe in God and the Gods more out of fear of the Gods (which they attribute the difficult experiences of their life to) than out of Love. In reality what they are really fearing is their own subconscious mind and the experiences repressed in it !

A devotee who firmly believes in the law of karma knows that the Gods do nothing bad, they are more evolved intelligent souls who are waiting for humanity to catch up and tune into their vast intelligence and wisdom. A true devotee doesn't blame anyone for what happens to him as he knows that whatever happens to him is a result of his own making. Equipped with this wisdom, he bravely faces those challenges and meets them head-on rather than avoiding it.

Lord Siva's form signifies this subtle secret, about how a human should live his life --- facing challenges head-on. A poisonous snake is symbolic of the difficulties and challenging experiences in life which generally people like to avoid/escape. By picking the poisonous snake with His hands and making it His ornamental necklace -- Lord Siva symbolically displays how to truly live life king size by not being afraid of the subconscious ! Then came a ferocious tiger to pounce upon Him (another symbol of a greater difficulty) -- Lord Siva rips the tiger apart and makes the tiger skin His costume with a smile of confidence. (This story is described in one of the scriptures).

The below teaching from my beloved guru who is a form of Lord Siva Himself, is something which i am applying in my life every minute and have also trained my mom to do the same. Undoubtedly she has ceased being depressed/fearful over the past week !

Do not be afraid of the subconscious. It is useless to be afraid of the past. If memories come up from the subconscious as if they happened yesterday, and you begin reacting emotionally and even physically all over again, say to yourself, "Welcome, welcome, welcome, memory from the past. My goodness, you're shaking my emotional body. I remember going through these emotional states years ago, and here we are reliving this film over again. But now I am on the spiritual path to enlightenment. I am the Self. One day I'm going to realize it fully. I only live in this physical body. I use these emotions, but I won't be used by them. They are my tools. So here you are, my memory pattern, trying to make me feel like I did five years ago before I reprogrammed my subconscious and awakened spiritually. Oh, memory from the past, you have tested me well. Thank you." Then, like a good secretary, write down on a piece of paper everything you can remember about these experiences that have come before your vision, and burn the paper when you have finished. Write down the entire experience that you are reacting to emotionally.

This paper-burning serves three purposes. First, it is symbolic to the subconscious that you are not going to react anymore to that particular problem. You have, through the act of writing it down, taken it out of the subconscious. Second, burning the paper means that no one else will read it, which might cause other problems. It also means that through the act of burning subconscious memories, you have released them forever.

When you begin to meditate, you become keen and perceptive enough to begin to see within yourself. Occasionally, you will see into the subconscious area and begin emotionally to relive the past. This means that many of the predominantly strong memory and reactionary patterns of the past loom up before you, one after another, and you may begin to react to them all over again, emotionally and even physically. These are not real experiences. It is only a layer of the subconscious exposing itself to your inner vision, indicating that reprogramming is needed. Handle each layer dynamically. Welcome the thoughts and accompanying feelings in a hospitable way. Do not fear them or regret them, and certainly do not criticize yourself for having them. Simply remove them from the subconscious by writing them down and burning the paper. The reaction will subside, but the memory will linger as an education upon which you can formulate decisions for the future, thus avoiding the same problem.

All is good

This was a good learning which came out from the super-conscious mind today, I had a dear old friend who was quite regularly keeping in touch with me. Then things unfolded in such a way that i reacted regarding a particular event that was common to our lives. I was sticking to my viewpoint and she was sticking to hers. One thing led to the other until the mutual disagreement became strong. This made this friend of mine stop keeping in touch with me, though i didn't do the same.

Somehow this thought was in the back of my subconscious affecting me everyday. My Mind never agreed that I was wrong. And so it rationalized that there was no need to apologize.

Then while focusing on the "eee" sound in my meditation, an intuitive thought struck me in my meditation that - "all is good", if a circumstance or event in life is affecting me, it is actually making me unfold faster spiritually as it will make me try harder to center myself. If nothing in the world affects me, then my unfoldment would definitely be slow.

Second learning is If something affects me and makes me react, then given the same circumstances i would do the same action - which i now perceive as a problem affecting me. In other words, whatever affects us and makes us react is a reflection of our own subconscious attitudes. The sore spot is located there - in the subconscious mind. That is where the treatment is required.

This again proves what my guru said -- The world is our university.

Things that you cannot face in yourself you will hate when you see them in someone else. To counteract this, your universal love, the platform for Self Realization, must be awakened into the emotions of the instinctive mind and filter out into the conscious mind. So, as you are meditating and the various aspects of your subconscious come up, face them positively, reprogram them beautifully, and they will settle back into simply a memory pattern, resolved and incapable of disturbing you again.

Amazing Dream

I could not sleep till late night out of excitement that my parents were returning from Singapore the next day and i was going there early morning to pick them.

But sometime early morning before i got up, i had an amazing dream. Now i know my guru and practice His teachings for nearly 3 years. For the 2nd time in 3 years i could clearly see my guru face to face in my dream. It was more of an astral body meeting than a dream, as i could feel his feet.

I, in my dream with a big million dollar smile when i see him, speak to Him how much i love His teaching, how much it has influenced my life - "Merging with Siva" for a long time now. I tell him how much fortunate I am to meet Him in person which is the rarest of opportunities. And in my mind its the year 2001 when He was still alive on earth. And I'm telling Him thanks for giving me His darshan before His leaving the earthly body. At that point, in that pleasant meeting i am shedding tears in joy seeing my long awaited guru to whom I'm filled with love and who is responsible for whatever i have understood about the world, life and its constant learnings. Who is responsible for everything i am today.

i had been to ISCKON before i met my guru, i had learnt about Ramakrishna Paramahamsa, Vivekananda- before i met my guru, i had learnt about the great devotees of Lord Vishnu -- Ambarisa, Dhruv, Prahllad, Arjun, Hanuman, Mira bai, had read the Gita, but there was something missing -- i didnt know how i could love an un-seen God -- True there are many devotees in history who have loved God, who have set an example of Bhakti, but i was not sure how can i love someone whom i have never seen, never had a conversation with, not even sure existent or non-existent ? I also had many doubts as to why people who do wrong and dont care about anyone other than themselves, I,Me,Myself types -- often grow in life and not the genuinely good souls? It was only this great Guru of Saiva Sampradaya, who was one of the great kings of the Chola Dynasty in one of his previous lives and who as the king built the Chidambaram temple -- He was the one who really dispelled all my doubts with precise answers that i was looking for.

Coming back to the dream. I tell him from my thoughts that He was the one who is responsible to make me understand that the world is my University. All this telepathic conversation happening so fast. So much being conveyed in a short time. Then i see his eyes looking at me and filled with tears flowing. Thats when i realize that how super-sensitive my guru is - a characteristic of a pure devotee. My love overflows for Him and His for me -- and without thinking further, I bow down and touch his feet. I can see his feet isn't touching the ground. Its about two inches above the ground. While I'm observing it, He places both his palm fingers on my backbone to bless me. At that moment -- suddenly i feel a gush of energy entering my body through his fingers. It was one of the most spectacular feelings. The energy was stimulating all the chakras simultaneously. Yet it was unfathomable and i didnt exactly understand what exactly was being received by me.

That sudden gush of energy brought me back into my conscious mind and i woke up from that dream. Tried closing eyes again expecting the wonderful dream to continue but of no avail.

i dedicate the blog post at my gurudeva's feet which is floating in mid air - 2 inches above earth. And pray that He come again and again in my visions to guide me. I will end this post with a beautiful teaching regarding the mind - from my guru, but attempted in my own words.

There is but one mind. The consciousness or the ego travels in its various phases. One-tenth of this mind which is of the conscious plane, in ramification, is carried on by its own novelty. The goal is to control the conscious mind and be consciously conscious.

Understanding is Control

My guru once said -- There are many mystics in the world who have had no formal training and yet seem to unfold inwardly very rapidly simply by learning the 5 states of mind, how to distinguish one from another, and how to move awareness within them consciously and systematically. They are participating in and enjoying some of the benefits of being able to experience step-by-step direct cognition of the five states of mind -- conscious mind, subconscious mind, sub of the subconscious mind, subsuperconscious mind and superconscious mind.

Concentrate upon that mind, observe the thoughts, feelings and actions from within and know that your mind is yours to use to the extent you know how to control it using the will.

Why must you study the mind ?

Why must you study the mind ? because understanding alone is fifty percent control of the mind. This understanding is necessary to impress the subconscious deeply enough to secure awareness so that spiritual strength continues to come from within.

"Understanding is Control"

The way mystics use the mind is like this - When a situation comes up - observe how the conscious mind looks at it. Then they ask how the subconscious mind looks at it. Pondering further they inquire how the super conscious looks at it. Through this process they get the clear picture of what exactly happened and whether it must be taken seriously or not. The situation was perhaps -- just a subconscious reaction such as an anger towards someone -- so you forgive yourself and forget it. The subconscious was the problem in this case.

It is the super conscious intuitive understanding that helps making such judgments.