I meditate intensely and after half an hour – I see the mind for what it is – a “self created principle” to put it in my gurudevas words. Thoughts come and go, then mind is still, yet the stillness is also a state of mind for a good observant ‘third’ eye. The thoughts are due to unresolved karmas and I observe them as they are being worked out by the soul. What is it that prevents me to realize Parasiva from this point?
Gurudeva answers
It is karma that keeps us from knowing of and reaching life's final goal, yet it is wrong to even call it a goal. It is what is known by the knower to have always existed. It is not a matter of becoming the Self, but of realizing that you never were not the Self.
Daily I observe behind every conversation with family and friends – the mind working out its karma. It is the cause for ‘pleasant’ or ‘heated’ conversations. Then I observe that a dominant karmic desire that has dominated the mind – the desire to be better / improve. It is this desire to improve which is present in every human being that takes the soul finally towards the self.
But Gurudeva says
Prior to that, it is a goal. After realization, one thing is lost, the desire for the Self.
After self realization the desire for the self is also lost because the ego which “houses” the desire is dead. This is the reason gurudeva asks people in general
Are we ready for the final journey life has to offer? Are we prepared to endure the hardships of sadhana, to suffer the death of the ego? Or would we prefer more pleasures in the world of "I" and "mine"?
My Immediate Goal : Maintain the meditation consistency in mornings. The thing to be practiced now is maintaining awareness over the object of concentration for a greater amount of time at will until effortless concentration is achieved.
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